Chapsticks don't have teeth...

Oh Hildi dear! I can't believe you are still pitching that story about the chapstick. I suppose you will tell that lie til the day you die. Face facts- you bit me on the ass. I had the teeth marks to prove it!! I can't believe you're still perpetuating that story about poking me. I think you've blocked the truth from your mind. Like a serial killer who blacks out and comes to with blood on his hands and no idea how it got there!

And frankly, I don't remember the tooth-paste incident. Therefore, it never happened. And if it did...well...you must've deserved it. You were kind of a brat.

But I'm totally here for you with your addiction. I understand the lure of the printed word. Those books entice with their glossy covers and come hither synopses. Their pull is strong! And you think a page or two will suffice, but two hours later you come up for air only to find that the meatloaf is burned, your youngest has fallen asleep on the potty (waiting for you to wipe their bum) and your husband is due home any minute!! True story. But there is help girl. I'm a survivor. I limit my reading time to after I've crawled into bed. Or anytime I'm forced to wait in public (doctors office, DMV, killing time before picking up a kid). Or I'm done with all daily chores and manage to squeeze out a few minutes for myself. Which happens so infrequently I probably didn't even need to mention it.

Now, if I could just get a handle on my internet addiction...facebook, bejewelled, blogging, email....so much to do, so little time.

trading one for the other,
♥Gert

Hildi!!! Get your nose out of that book and blog already!

Hildi,

I'm seriously thinking of disowning you. I know I bought you books for your birthday, but you need to put down the book slowly and back away and nobody gets hurt!! I mean it. For serious. Remember that time you threw a porcelain hair brush at me and I ducked and it left a nick in the wall? Or what about the time you spit your grape bubble gum in the back of my hair and mom had to cut it out? And I already had a ridiculous haircut to begin with? I could go on, you know. But I'll stop here...but only if you start blogging again. Don't make me tell people where the bodies are buried. And I know that you know that I know that...oh dear, I lost track. Anyway, just freakin blog. Or I'm not coming to visit you ever again. Or bringing you books. Or pistachios.

I mean, we have followers!! You owe them something. If you won't do it for me...do it for them. For the love of Bob, Hildi! Have a heart! We also have an award to pick up at Heather's place. So put down the book, brush your hair, and kick the kids off the computer. Pull yourself together girl and write an acceptance speech.

your loving but desperate sister,
♥Gert

PS~ If you don't blog back I'm going to tell people that you're in rehab. It won't be true of course (they don't make rehab for book addicts, duh) but people will believe me. And then you'll be sorry.

Letting go...

I have decided you're right. There's truly nothing I can do. Yes, I do remember how I felt. Unfortunately, I now also understand how mom & dad felt. And Larry summed it all up when he said "god, the next time I see your dad I'm going to apologize profusely for what I put him through. he's a better man then me". So there you go. And through it all...mad as they were...I still knew they loved me. And really...this bad choice is NOT worth losing my daughter or the relationship I have with her over. And maybe (huge "maybe" here) it will come out all right in the end. As you said, I've fought the good fight, the best way I knew how. Time to trust her judgement. (Wow. Who knew that was gonna be so damn hard or suck so bad?) So in the interest of that...I'm actually going to the jewelry store with him today. I know that sounds counter productive but if he's determined to buy a ring...I'm going to make sure it's worthy of my baby. And maybe she'll be smart enough to say no anyway? Yeah...I'm not betting the farm on it...but engaged isn't married.

Christmas christmas christmas. Geez! Seriously, I'm bowing down to your magnificent feat of organization. Seriously, who knew you had it in you??? Or that you and Jerome could actually work together without being at each others throats? I have only accomplished the feat of finishing my christmas shopping before thanksgiving once in my entire life. And it was totally on my own. Most of my gifts will be of the homemade variety this year...so please...pretend you like them. As long as I stick with edibles for the men, I know I'm safe. Lol. But I do need to get my crafty little butt in gear.

So we are not going to be able to come to your house for Thanksgiving. Sorry love. I can't afford the gas. So I opted for saying we were going and staying home...just me, Larry & Jethro...Lulu has committed to going to Peter's relatives. But Larry says we must make appearances at his family's shindigs. Woo freakin hoo. This means I get to make a call to the non favorite sis in law to get times and my bring a covered dish assignment. I couldn't be more thrilled. Go holidays!

Well, I'm off to town. At least I have lunch with Roxy to look forward to. And a trip to the library. Yeah...I live the exciting life. You know you're jealous. =]

good friends, good food, good books,
gert♥

Bah Humbug!

Hildi,

Why is she my mom when she's doing something bad? Do you only claim her when she's good?! So flashback for you...remember my senior year when I asked mom & dad for birth control? After all of their "you can come to us with anything" talks and I screwed up my courage to face them, they exploded. Mom way more then Dad, surprisingly. Remember how not only did I not get my birth control, but Mom didn't speak to me for three solid weeks (not a word). She even asked Dad to go shopping with her!!! I do not want to be like that. Really. But I'm so upset & disappointed with Lulu right now it's hard to even look at her, much less speak civilly. All the cautious optimism? Yeah, that's just me fooling myself. Apparently Peter & his friend George are fixing up the house George bought (currently it lacks plumbing in the bathroom) so that they (and Lulu) will have a place to live. And he's going ahead and buying the ring. Not only am I scared s#!tless for her, I just feel so betrayed. I know...they are supposed to grow up and gain some independence and eventually leave the nest. I also know that they will fall in love and then put that person above all others including mom & dad. And if I thought he was even remotely worthy of her love or even had the potential to be worthy...I think (I hope) I could be supportive even though she's so young. But my stars...to put someone who's obsessive, controlling, drunk, mean spirited, and dumb (sorry, but he is!) above the family that has bent over backwards for you for your entire life just seems like a slap in the face. And I'm not sure how to handle this best. Good god...why can't they come with instruction booklets...and troubleshooting tips like electronic devices do??!

Hahahaha on your christmas woes! Not that I am unsympathetic...I've just been there...and the only thing to do is laugh...or you will cry. I gave up ever asking Larry for gift-giving suggestions long ago. I make a list, do the shopping, and then tell him what I bought. Mostly, I do all the wrapping too because he sucks at it. He even gets Lulu to make a list for him, shop with him (sometimes without him), and then wrap the gifts he gets me!!! Which is an improvement because the first year we spent christmas together he gave me all my gifts in brown paper sacks. I cried. Did I mention that the man hates christmas? Seriously! Has ever since I met him. And in what will be 20 christmases together, I have not been able to change his mind or inject any appreciation for the yuletide festivities into his spirit. Weird, huh? He is the original Scrooge. Bah Humbug!

Speaking of our parental units, I will be seeing them tomorrow I guess. They are coming down to gma's and I so I will go over there for a little while. Guess I better get Jethro & Lulu to finish up those lists today. Don't want the Christmas termagent breathing down my neck! Another funny thing you forgot...how even with lists...sometimes we don't get the one thing we really wanted (muffin tins!!). I'm just saying...


in a flurry of list making,
gert♥

An Introduction...

so let me introduce us...



I'm Gertrude. I'm seven years older then Hildi. We grew up in a military household. Dad was in the service so we got drug all over the place. I went to 9 different schools in 12 years of schooling and Hildi went to 9. I loved moving & didn't mind changing schools. Hildi now says she liked it...but I seem to remember her hating it. Of course I loved school and Hildi hated it. Sometimes I think we grew up in the backseat of the family car...traveling from wherever to wherever or coming home to the midwest and mom's family for visits or to the south for visits with dad's kin. We were a pretty close family and when we moved to a new place we only had each other until we made friends. So despite the age difference, Hildi & I were close. Until I left home. After I graduated, I moved to the midwest to stay with our gma and go to school. Hildi moved to yet another base with the parents way out west. Then I got married (far earlier than planned) and Hildi felt she lost me. Hildi's teenage years were kinda rough and while she was dealing with that I was dealing with three small children, life in a small town, and very little money.



But happily-- years later...I have three teenagers...Irwin...who just turned 18...has autism. He lives in a group home about two hours away where he has access to newer treatments, attends a school with people trained about autism, and can keep a routine. We all miss him dearly but he comes home for visits frequently and seems content where he is. Lulu is 17...she works, has a steady boyfriend (not the one I'd choose for her of course), and is a pretty responsible girl. She's also drop dead gorgeous which creates no end of problems let me tell you. Jethro is 15...he attends the local high school for drivers ed only. We homeschool him and Lulu. He has a genius IQ and really doesn't like a lot of people. He's the funniest person I know. And Larry...the husband. He's a pretty good guy. Funny, hardworking, loves his family.



And Hildi's family? Well she's has two adorable daughters. Patience is 8. And the name is true irony. She is a smart pretty little girl who reminds me alot of Jethro at that age. Intellectually anyway. She is in 3rd grade. Prudence is 3...and beautiful, good-natured and also smart. She is still the baby of the family and very attached to her momma! Both of them of course, adore their aunt Gert! And Hildi is a favorite with my kids...in fact...sometimes I think Lulu and Hildi are one soul in two bodies. They are that much alike. And Hildi is married to Jerome. Also a pretty good guy. Hard worker, loves his family, great sense of humor. Currently driving Hildi crazy. But if there's one thing I've learned after 18 years of marriage...it's that you'll have that now and again.

And Hildi and I once again have each other. Sure I have a little more marriage & parenting experience but we're on way more equal footing. And Hildi is still young enough to remind me what it was like to be a teenager which definately helps.



So read on dear public...now that the basics are out of the way....let's get to the good stuff...



love,

gert