Hildi,
Why is she my mom when she's doing something bad? Do you only claim her when she's good?! So flashback for you...remember my senior year when I asked mom & dad for birth control? After all of their "you can come to us with anything" talks and I screwed up my courage to face them, they exploded. Mom way more then Dad, surprisingly. Remember how not only did I not get my birth control, but Mom didn't speak to me for three solid weeks (not a word). She even asked Dad to go shopping with her!!! I do not want to be like that. Really. But I'm so upset & disappointed with Lulu right now it's hard to even look at her, much less speak civilly. All the cautious optimism? Yeah, that's just me fooling myself. Apparently Peter & his friend George are fixing up the house George bought (currently it lacks plumbing in the bathroom) so that they (and Lulu) will have a place to live. And he's going ahead and buying the ring. Not only am I scared s#!tless for her, I just feel so betrayed. I know...they are supposed to grow up and gain some independence and eventually leave the nest. I also know that they will fall in love and then put that person above all others including mom & dad. And if I thought he was even remotely worthy of her love or even had the potential to be worthy...I think (I hope) I could be supportive even though she's so young. But my stars...to put someone who's obsessive, controlling, drunk, mean spirited, and dumb (sorry, but he is!) above the family that has bent over backwards for you for your entire life just seems like a slap in the face. And I'm not sure how to handle this best. Good god...why can't they come with instruction booklets...and troubleshooting tips like electronic devices do??!
Hahahaha on your christmas woes! Not that I am unsympathetic...I've just been there...and the only thing to do is laugh...or you will cry. I gave up ever asking Larry for gift-giving suggestions long ago. I make a list, do the shopping, and then tell him what I bought. Mostly, I do all the wrapping too because he sucks at it. He even gets Lulu to make a list for him, shop with him (sometimes without him), and then wrap the gifts he gets me!!! Which is an improvement because the first year we spent christmas together he gave me all my gifts in brown paper sacks. I cried. Did I mention that the man hates christmas? Seriously! Has ever since I met him. And in what will be 20 christmases together, I have not been able to change his mind or inject any appreciation for the yuletide festivities into his spirit. Weird, huh? He is the original Scrooge. Bah Humbug!
Speaking of our parental units, I will be seeing them tomorrow I guess. They are coming down to gma's and I so I will go over there for a little while. Guess I better get Jethro & Lulu to finish up those lists today. Don't want the Christmas termagent breathing down my neck! Another funny thing you forgot...how even with lists...sometimes we don't get the one thing we really wanted (muffin tins!!). I'm just saying...
in a flurry of list making,
gert♥
Cat Pawtector!
5 hours ago
OK, I can't answer to lists because quite frankly I just don't care about Christmas and shopping. However, you know I have a lot to say about Lulu's situation. If it were me, and you know I'm a bitch but tough love works. Seriously, the middle one is getting A's and B's after D's and F's. I asked what changed and she said, you took everything away and I figured it was easier to get good grades. I took all phone, tv, computer and friend privileges away. It was awful but it worked.Slightly different. Anyways...love is always in the equation but you have to be tough. You owe your children a roof over their heads and nutrition. You do not owe them cell phones, use of your home telephone, use of your televisions, use of your home to entertain friends, use of your vehicles or use of insurance or a door on their bedroom. Recently my dear heart told me that at 18 she didn't feel that she should have to ask me to go places. I said, I can respect that if you can respect the fact that I don't think I should have to give you my insurance discounts and cell phone discounts and perhaps you should think about that as you are paying 100 for your cell instead of 10 or you are paying 200 a month for insurance instead of 50.
ReplyDeleteOh anyways, it's easier said than done but you know there are ways to make life not so easy on them. If she leaves she will have the same bills. It can be easy or hard, her decision.
OMG Lulu needs to be hung up from her toes and have some sense knocked into her. I thought she promised no drama this time and that it wasn't serious. And I hate to say it but I think someday you need to let the boys do what they have been plotting for months. It would make them feel better but I know it would upset her. Makes my problems seem stupid and idiotic. Thanks I needed that reminder. I wish I had better advice for you but I haven't been there yet. Maybe someday. But I'm here if you need to vent.
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